"Decision to commit suicide of a teenager is so momentous that he, even himself gets astonished if survived after a failed suicide attempt" My dear Ezine readers, I am indeed very grateful to all of you for the encouragement you have given to me in preventing Adolescence Suicide a worldwide endeavor. My exertion in salvage our promising, potential, keen, aficionado and enthusiast teenagers indeed deserve the best of comforts, guidance and hold to make our planet a peaceful place. The memories of Virginia University campus macabre massacre has left every sane someone shattered; but nevertheless the life goes on as usual. Once, my grandfather Sri Ramji Das Mehta said quote "life on the earth does not wait for whatever and moves with the time. Anyone, who does not move with it, is left behind; and he has wasted those many happy moments of his life" unquote. When I analyze his last words, I find that every word of his quotes is true to the last word. You will agree with me that there is someone else cause also which tempts a teenager to take away his life. What are these issues I would share with my esteem readers?
When I wished to open a series of articles on the burning issue of teenager suicide, I have never imagined that we united would be able to convince our teenagers to stop ending their lives under stress. Before I progress further; I would also debate about assorted concerns of teenagers due to which they go astray. The Pampered Child Syndrome (Pcs) is not common in modern world. Readers would share my concern that such children are often known for indiscipline and arrogant behavior. What do I indeed mean with Pcs is that a child who is in case,granted with all worldly comforts but fails to adjust himself with his common colleagues and classmates.
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While trying to analyze and understand the true causes of external factor affecting teenagers' suicide other than parent and school, I have observed among parents of such teenagers three basic flows,
o My first view is that when the parents are exceptionally over committed and they find difficult to frequently share time with their wards, they often believe that their teenagers should be just contacted as and when required and not much concentration is paid. Parents repeatedly overlook their teenagers assorted arrogant and hutted behavior. They feel that parents should furnish maximum comforts to their wards while studying. I ordinarily call it "King ease Clan" (Kcc). There is a need for the parents to recite what ease is required; and what the bare necessities for studies are? I advise that parents rather than fulfilling and meeting the necessities, must interact with their teenagers to become adaptable in the society. Over 42% teenagers from High wage Groups and Middle wage Groups (Hig/Mig) come from such background. Even sometimes single child among Hindus have sufficient coddled the child to blight his/her future. The parents need to be guided to conduct time and space well to share their wards joyous occasion and hold stressful time.
o The second foremost facet is the Blind Provisioning of Requirement (Bpr) of teenagers by some parents. The Bpr should be determined weighed before fulfilling their teenagers' demands. Some times I have observed that parents fulfill the ask without judiciously analyzing the need. I would say the need and ask of teenagers has to be weighed against his option of Preferences vocation (Cpc) as debated earlier. Every parent has the wisdom to take premeditated steps in guiding their teenagers' future. I advise that parents should be alive to the environmental changes around their teenagers to take preventive portion in case of stress and strain is developed. The blind provisioning of needs often spoils the child at the later age. I identify the Bpr as one of the most foremost cause of Teenagers and Adolescence Suicide (Taas).
o My third perception is to debate about the reality of money in present environment. Some parents weigh everything with the money. I have termed it as "Money Mended Parents" (Mmp). Parents, irrespective of the needs and requirements of their teenagers in schools, do shelve out money to their teenagers just to make them happier; but indeed they have unintentionally paved the way for insolvent wards in long run. Such parents believe that every thing can be weighed with the money. Their perception is imbibed by their wards and exhibited at assorted chance to profess their position with respect to other teenagers. teenager and I have observed that on as now discuss a few issues which are neither
After prolonged study on assorted suicide cases I have terminated that the "Decision to commit suicide of a teenager is so momentous that he, even himself gets astonished if survived after a failed suicide attempt". Some of the teenagers have revealed that before development a Suicidal exertion (Sa) they have believed that:
· One; the life is useless and I am relieving myself from the miseries of world;
· Two; they feel themselves so helpless that they cannot perform what they wanted; therefore, they must end their life. Such incidences take place with extremely Ambitious Parents (Hap).
· Three; often they move around aimlessly for sometimes before an Sa;
· Four; usually either they become silent and secluded or very violent and arrogant from others while trying to conceal their intention;
· Five; exhibit very tense and worrisome facial expression one or two days before the Sa;
· Six; often hint using threatening languages to end his/her life; and when parents take it as a joke, they commit suicide due to frustration. I have studied that a teenager would exhibit his intention very clearly to his parents before development a Sa. He would indeed dramatize his intention by words, deeds or action.
· Seven; would exhibit sense of dejection and fruitless life. Such teenagers often begin to talk about the wasteful life and measures to free from worldly miseries.
· Eight; ordinarily acts in a manner to draw concentration of his parents or someone he loves most. He would call and try to ascertain his position in his favorite people's heart. Often he/she would say quote "how would you feel if I die" and so on.
· Ninth; the sense of hatred reaches the zenith of such teenagers' temperament. They repeatedly begin to talk about the someone whom they dislike or had some problem. The abusive language should a clear indication to monitor their teenagers activities to avoid Sa;
· Tenth; I have also observed that some teenagers try to clear all their financial dues if any they had. They would reply very casually but clearly indicating their intention such as "I may not live longer to repay", "who has seen future", or "how do you know, who is alive tomorrow" and so on.
The above activities of teenagers though engender doubts in the mind of all but
parents seldom take it seriously. The theory of Third Suicidal Factors among teenagers goes to Sri Jagan Nath Ba and Srimati Devki Devi who had always kept watch in my community to forestall such suicides. What are Third Suicidal Factors and how it influences teenagers to commit suicide?
I defined the Third Suicidal Factor (Tsf) as creation of adverse circumstances around a teenager's environment which affects his former behavior while performing studies at school". The Tsf are found out to be quite high among my pampered teenagers and some fatherless teenagers in third world and Asian countries. Though some odd cases can not be ruled out in European and American countries but by and large ration is far higher in Asian countries. I would now discuss as to what are these Tsf?
· One; the first and foremost Tsf is the Ambitions. The over, super and hyper Ambitious teenagers are more susceptible to exploit. They wish to succeed at all cost to fulfill their parent's dream. I have come over a girl teenager who had compromised with her instructor to get good grade in the school. She prolonged to top the school but when time of real test came; she failed, thus, going into severe reasoning stress. She ended her life with a guilty conscience left behind in the suicide note. I advise that parents should share their mind repeatedly with their teenagers that whatsoever they perform with hard work are standard to them; therefore, the teenagers should work hard.
· Second the next foremost Tsf is the friendship and group of teenager. I have personally seen a teenager becoming druggist and going astray. They indulge in unwanted sex at premature age, thus, loosing vital body power at very tender age. An old Indian saying, that chameleon changes color on seeing other chameleon" proofs true. The teenagers succeed the community as per his friends circle. ordinarily teenagers of Bpr and Mmp become victim of such bad society. The most recent Rap party of Pune in India where police have caught over two hundred adults and teenagers using drugs and liquor. A few teenagers from Low wage Group (Lig) usually get fascinated and trapped to ultimately either commit suicide or become criminals. I advise that parents must profess a working school program for their wards on monthly basis and one of the parents must routinely succeed the program not to spy but to check teenager erroneous steps.
· Third, someone else Tsf issue is the Money. Some of the teenagers get complicated in earning easy money to have comfortable but unaffordable life style of riches. Such teenagers succeed illegal course and often end up in committing suicide. The modern lifestyle has drifted many great students towards criminality. The easy money coming made many male teenagers chain snatchers or burglars. A teenager had attempted to commit suicide due to shame and disrepute he brought to his family after police nabbed him. Despite knowing well that he was not complicated but police has caught him due his unknowingly close presence with the boy who was indeed a thief. I advise that parents should keep a time program of their wards and often check with school authorities about any absence of their wards from schools.
· Fourth; the most foremost Tsf is the Improper management Attitude (Isa) of parent's both at home and school which drifts their teenagers towards gambling, drugs and liquor parties. I advise that parents should profess continuous transportation with their wards. Parents need to carryout weekly free interaction to profess their educational preparations. Any lapse of parents in Time Managing and Monitoring program (Tmms) of their wards might lead into unmanageable conditions later. All parents are request to profess Som Kalpna Time Managing and Monitoring program (Tmms) chart. It is a uncomplicated chart designed with a religious emblem of your religion in the top center followed by name of ward, date of birth, class and school time table along with tuition. It should be thereafter divided as, subject, time from to, break tea or lunch, games and other. At the bottom should record tuition timings, television favorite serials or film times, and minimum forty five minutes of corporeal practice or game playing time. The last Coolum should always have sleep time noted as Sleep before 11 Pm and rise early to study at 5 or 6 Am.
· Fifth; in increasing to above a few other unforeseen Tsf could be unintentional involvement in crimes or illegal activities such as copying while examinations on other student's encouragement or so on. Notwithstanding the above, my advice coming of Rash are
o usually interact and continuously monitor your teenager's time program but never follow;
o Avoid Pampering your child;
o hold his bad decisions, and
o Hear all problems patiently. My exertion to debate about the Third Suicidal Factors (Tsf), is to progress the base of educating probable couples to understand the complexities of life if teenagers fall pary to any of the Tsf noted above. I am very determined that a large amount of teenagers would be saved from falling pray to Tsf with active understanding of parents and teachers. I would analyze the common causes of suicide other than one Attitudinal Changes noted above in my exertion to unfold as to why a teenager commits suicide?
Tip to prevent Adolescence Suicide - Third Factors Part - 9